The Sumerians developed writing, invented the wheel, redirected rivers, partied with aliens, wrote secret scrolls, and basically accomplished more in five minutes of existence than the hosts of the show have accomplished in 40 years. Archeologists, had they returned our calls would have confirmed though - they never hosted a podcast. Bam! How you like them apples Sumer? Hail an Uber Camel and travel on a hilarious expedition to Mesopotamia’s most mystifying and ancient culture. Come for the history, but stay for the extraterrestrials, mysterious “Planet X” and tips on how to turn a demigod into a night watchman. Who wouldn't’ want to know that?
Disclaimer: You will be rewarded karmically by listening to this podcast.
Ah, that Karma - she’s an unforgiving lassie. Some might even say karma’s a b__ch. Help an old lady across the street, grab a couple cold ones, then journey on an auditory safari through the spiritual concept of karma on today’s show. How does karma work? Is it real or just something conjured up by hippy store owners to sell more crystals? Is it instant or spread out over multiple lifetimes? Do we have a karmic scoreboard thus pre-determining the karmic journey of our life before we set foot outside the amniotic fluid? Swing by momentarily for the spiritual enlightenment, stay a while for the show’s host who thinks he’s Ethel Merman. Uh, we can explain. No, we probably can’t.
On this hilariously tantalizing episode, the Grognostic lads grab the sarcophagus by the esophagus and exhume their way inside ancient Egypt’s most sinister intrigue - tomb curses. Are they real, mere coincidences, or just something Brendan Frazier conjured up to get more people to watch his films? And of course, some of life’s most-queried conundrums will also be addressed - why don’t we see more mummy apparitions on boat cruises? How come there aren’t more cat selfies on social media? Why aren’t more drug-addicted archeologists just out and about? Come take a journey deep into the less explored, hilarious bowels of antiquity and explore for yourself, if you dare.
Ever had the feeling you’ve been abducted and probed by beings from another world? If so it just means that your roommate is getting friendlier than you’d probably like. On this episode Jason and Steve teeter on the edge of paranormal and prank when they dive into the disputed world of crop circles. Bringing a level of comedic gravitas found nowhere else, they even manage to discuss menstrual cycles. I’m sorry, what’s that now? So...are crop circles real? Fake? A message from Mel Gibson? You’ll just have to listen and explore for yourself. Have a pint or two with us in the process.
What do balls of stone, magically delicious inhabitants, and sexual escapades with an iconic, iron tower in France have to do with the most advanced neolithic society to walk the planet? Absolutely nothing, but we figured we’d talk about them anyway. Skara Brae, a stone-built, prehistoric village off mainland Scotland remained untouched for over 5000 years. Once discovered, it brought to light how little we know about the history of our species. On this episode, explore the best-preserved neolithic settlement the world has ever seen. Come for the history, but stay for the hilarity, not to mention the best Scottish accent west of San Francisco.
80-ton statues walking on their own. Magical spirit essence raining down from the heavens. A thriving island population mysteriously turning to cannibalism. A birdman cult. The remains of the Easter Bunny pristinely preserved in a shallow grave. Four of these are true. Well, maybe three. Two tops. On this show, your least-favorite lads tackle the most mystifying island on the planet, Easter Island, while also showcasing their award-winning acting talents.
The red pill, the blue pill, and pints of frosty beer - which will you choose?
How much do you think you know about your own species? Can you prove you're not a sequence of binary 1s and 0s programmed by some futuristic teenager in his mom's basement up in the clouds? One well-respected theorist has determined that "without question" the human race is a simulation. On this episode your favorite lads, well-respected by no one discuss the idea that the truth of your existence is actually way beyond your wildest imagination.
Organs with Memories, A Prophet Who Likes to Party & Dead-ringers. It's All Science. We Think.
Do organs contain desires, memories, and the story of the body they belong to? Can that narrative continue if transplanted into another person long after the donor has been gone? Or is this the makings of another Jessica Alba movie gone terribly wrong? In this first-ever episode, fittingly posted on St. Patrick's Day, Jason & Steve examine the idea that leaving your heart in San Francisco may mean you're living on posthumously inside someone else. Or it could mean they now know your yahoo password and are setting your fantasy football lineup to all kickers. Listen in.
Take a listen as Jason and Steve dive into their first-ever podcast. One day when they're neither rich nor famous, listeners will look back at this first attempt and think - they really haven't improved much have they? In this episode they try their best to explain what sort of mystique and thought-provoking topics they'll be covering as well as exactly what a Grognostic really is, while also digressing multiple times in attempts to quell their nerves.
Frolic on precipice of discovery, rouse your curious mind, and expand self-awareness as Jason and Steve take you on an educational, yet hilarious journey through an explorative stew of mystical, historic, cultural and scientific. Prepare to laugh, learn, and enter into an introspective reverie as they ascertain topics that have always intrigued you whether you know it or not. Are you not ascertained? Are you not ascertained? You will be.